誰にも言えない、 心の中でずっと叫んでる。 本当はまだわからない、 笑い返して、 嘘ついてるみたい。 どうしたらいいの？言えないよ！「 さようなら」。

マーク、ありがどう、そして、さようなら

終於明白什麼叫做兩個人的孤獨？可能是改變得太快讓我一下子不適應，怎麼突然覺得心的距離得有點遠？我想你，你也會想我嗎？以前什麼都第一時間告訴我，多無聊及細微的事都說，還怕我會忘記，偶爾會重複的說著，感到你很關心我，無論做什麼？去了那裡都會第一時間想到我。現在我不問就沒事發生似的。
我好像看到了以前的自己，你做的就是以前的我，是神你在給我開玩笑嗎？我嘗到了我給人的滋味是如何苦澀的了。不知不覺之間，我變了，只有你讓我改變。我變得對愛情很軟弱，從前那個那麼強勢的我去了流浪嗎？我要如何找回那個我來平衡自己。

How to level up our relateionship? I mean emotional and feelings. I was expressionless before, I regret I did. “Love” always is a confusion and difficulty project . I won’t pass this exam whole life. I know I am a lonely girl, doing a lonely things. Silly silly silly! I was mad of you even you can not concentrate to love me. Is it I leave quitely better than stand beside you? I ask myself over hundred times, I’ve no idea why love you more than myself? I am the best, I don’t need you care , I can take care by myself….. I can…..
I am mad about you. You are the first one made me feel like this.

Since he come back from Japan, he didn’t contact me like before, I know he was confuse about his work , living and me. But I can’t stand is he lie to me. And made a reason to broke up with me. I can change myself coz I love him . Don’t hurt me again pls, I pray to god .
Don’t know why really care his everything , although he didn’t have strong feeling. I always ask myself.Since he run in my life, he is a part of me, I want to share all of my happiness to him. Because I really care all of you. Don’t you know ? I love you so much. Maybe my guise only 60%, but inside my heart is 100%. Hope you feel it in one day .

I want to write down some of my thinking .